Nikki Sommer, a nurse practitioner with Key West Surgical Group, joined Good Morning Keys on Keys Talk 96.9/102.5FM this morning for Medical Matters.
With September being Suicide Prevention Month, it’s important to recognize warning signs, know how to respond and stay connected with loved ones.
Suicide can affect people from every background and that warning signs are not always obvious.
“Sometimes we can’t tell what’s going on with somebody just by looking at them,” Sommer said. “Someone can have a family, a job, friends, a home. They can appear successful. They can always smile. They always get to work on time, do their work. But they could be struggling internally.”
Suicide risk can be associated with a variety of circumstances, including depression, anxiety, bipolar disorder, PTSD, chronic pain, serious illness, substance use, financial stress, job loss, divorce or relationship problems, grief, trauma, social isolation, legal problems, sleep difficulties and major life changes.
Having one or more risk factors does not mean someone will attempt suicide, but they can indicate increased vulnerability.
Warning signs can include statements such as, “I don’t want to be here anymore,” “Everyone would be better off without me,” or “I can’t do this anymore.”
Sommer said people should take those comments seriously, even if they are made jokingly or by someone who is typically viewed as dramatic.
“Don’t assume those statements are attention seeking,” she said. “Just keep it in the back of your mind that something serious might be going on.”
Sommer also encouraged people not to be afraid to ask someone directly whether they are thinking about suicide.
“There’s a misconception that asking the question will put the idea in somebody’s head,” she said. “It doesn’t. Asking the question directly does not cause someone to become suicidal.”
She suggested saying something such as, “I’m worried about you. You seem really overwhelmed lately. Are you thinking about hurting yourself?”
If someone says they are thinking about suicide, the first step is to take them seriously, remain calm, avoid arguing or shaming them and listen.
“You could say things like, ‘I’m really glad you told me. I’m here with you. You’re not alone right now,’” she said. “The biggest thing is we’re going to find some help.”
It can also be important to ask whether the person has thought about how they would harm themselves, whether they have access to the means to do so and whether they have considered when they would act.
If someone has a specific plan, immediate access to lethal means and intends to act soon, Sommer said it should be treated as an emergency. The person should not be left alone and 911 should be called.
For those who are struggling but are not in immediate danger, help is available by calling or texting 988, the Suicide & Crisis Lifeline. Sommer emphasized that people do not have to be actively suicidal to contact 988. Someone who is overwhelmed, depressed, grieving, dealing with substance use, experiencing relationship or financial problems or simply unsure what to do next can reach out.
A person concerned about a friend or family member can also call or text 988 for guidance.
When someone is in crisis, Sommer said reducing access to potentially lethal means can also save lives. That can include securing firearms and other weapons, as well as prescription or over-the-counter medications and other items that could be used for self-harm.
“It’s not about punishing or taking control away from someone. It’s about their safety,” she said. “Creating a time and distance during a period when judgment is impaired is important.”
Sommer cautioned people not to attempt to remove potentially dangerous items themselves if doing so could escalate the situation. Instead, they can contact 988 or emergency authorities for assistance.
She also stressed the importance of following up after a crisis has passed. Mental health care, regular medical care, adequate sleep, social support and simply checking in with people can all play a role in suicide prevention.
“Suicide prevention really needs to happen all year round,” Sommer said. “We should be checking everybody every month — January, May, September — and then every month in between.”
Sommer said research has also challenged the common assumption that suicide rates peak around the winter holidays. She noted that suicide deaths have often increased during the spring and early summer, reinforcing the need for awareness throughout the year rather than concentrating prevention efforts on a single month.
For anyone struggling now, Sommer offered a direct message: “You are not alone. If you’re feeling exhausted, if you feel like you’re a burden, if you feel like your situation isn’t going to improve, don’t hold that inside. Please tell somebody. You don’t need to have perfect words to explain what’s going on. You can just say, ‘I’m not doing well,’ ‘I’m scared of what I’m thinking,’ or ‘I just need help.’”
She said families should also seek help if they are unsure how to respond to a loved one in crisis.
The 988 Suicide & Crisis Lifeline is available by phone or text for people experiencing emotional distress or concerned about someone else. For an immediate, life-threatening emergency, call 911 or take the person to an emergency room if it can be done safely.
Sommer’s central message was that suicide prevention depends on connection — taking warning signs seriously, asking difficult questions, listening without judgment, helping people get professional support and continuing to check on them long after a crisis has passed.